#thisisnotokay

  The events of last night have changed the course of my book. I know there isn't much I can do in a situation like this. But I can write. And if my words will change the mind of even one person then I have to try.

#hold a grudge

 I learned a little about myself the other day. Good thing or bad thing? I'm not sure yet, but it's true.  Anyway, for those of you who might not know. Last year I was in an accident and while I was in the hospital my nephew stole my bank card and went on a little spending spree. He was 27 at the time, certainly old enough to know better but that isn't the point. By the time he was finished I was out over  $1000.00 and my sister knew about this whole thing and didn't have the decency to tell me about it. She even went so far as to get my card from him and put it back in my purse so that I wouldn't find out when I was released from the hospital. When I found out I severed all ties with them, I was so sick of being taken advantage of and it was the best thing for me to do. Cut to one year later. I haven't spoken to them since and I've gone on with my life. I haven't forgiven but I have accepted the situation for what it was. Or so I thought. Then I was on my way to work and as I walked across the parking lot I saw my niece waving at me. She's 23 an adult and I have nothing against her. She didn't do anything to me. So I waved back, no big deal. Then I saw who was walking behind her. My sister. And I quickly realized that I haven't accepted things as fully as I thought I had. I remember thinking, If she says one word to me right now there will be trouble. Luckily she didn't. She just hung her head and kept walking. As did I. But by the time I walked into work, my hands were shaking. If I had been a cartoon you would have seen steam coming out of my ears. And that was when I learned that I am still so mad. And still so upset and hurt, and raw, about what happened a year ago. I haven't let it go. And I might never. Only time will tell.